Haltzman begins this marriage guide for men by emphasizing the biological differences between men and women, arguing that traditional approaches to marriage counseling can devalue men and ignore immutable male qualities. Evolutionary biology along with explanations of the limbic system governing emotions provide the foundation for Haltzman’s argument that much psychological dogma is possibly wrong, buoying married men by suggesting that it might be healthy “to keep your feelings to yourself” or that getting in touch with feelings is not a panacea for a better marriage. Then Haltzman, a psychiatry professor at Brown and operator of a Web site devoted to the “secrets of married men,” launches his eight strategies with remarkable vigor. Despite the author’s unorthodox theoretical groundwork, the strategies are commonsensical—make marriage your job, learn to listen, know your wife, aim to please. More important, they are extraordinarily well fleshed out and convincingly supported with useful “to do” lists and a multitude of examples. They will no doubt prove helpful to many men struggling to build a happy marriage. (Jan.)
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Theresa Foy DiGeronimo is the author of more than thirty-five books in the fields of education and parenting.
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